When I was a teenager, my father suggested I read The Art of Loving by Erich Fromm.  So I pulled the book off the shelf and dug in.  It turned out to be one of the most important books I have ever read.  Mainly because forging a loving relationship is one of the biggest challenges in life and we need all the help we can get.  In Rainer Maria Rilke’s more poetic words, “For one human being to love another human being. That is perhaps the most difficult task that has been entrusted to us, the ultimate task.”  

I have returned to Fromm’s book often for inspiration and guidance, and I have given it to countless friends.  When my husband and I were living in separate cities for a year we both read it at the same time to stay connected. We also chose a quote from this book to use in our wedding invitation:

“Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence.” 

Erich Fromm

Fromm was a practicing psychoanalyst, a committed social theorist, and prolific writer who lived from 1900 – 1980.  All of his books are classics but The Art of Loving, is his most popular international bestseller.  It is now in a fiftieth anniversary edition and has been translated into 34 different languages.

Dr. Helen Fisher

LOVE, Why do you fall in love with one person rather than another? That’s a good question. Dr. Helen Fisher’s book WHY HIM? WHY HER? explores the science of human attraction.  I’ve been reading her books as part of my ongoing love research, and recently I met her at a reading at the Open Center. She invited members of the audience to visit her LOVE LAB at Rutgers University where she conducts brain scans on people who have fallen in love.  I enthusiastically volunteered but haven’t heard back yet.  I hope she contacts me in the future.  It was such a thrill to meet a true love expert.  

http://www.chemistry.com/drhelenfisher/